ICE.COLD.COFFEE

It's finally Chinese New Year! My family went to my uncle's house as usual and I saw lots of my relatives and cousins there.

And as usual, we played blackjack and a little of Mahjong. The fun part about CNY is getting together for a game of cards. I love my cousins cos they are all so fun to be with. (although I hate them for having such good figures and being so pretty. Hmph.... haha...)

We usually bet 50 cents a every hand of blackjack. At first, I lost $3. But when we started the 2nd round, I won $5+ so I still managed to win a little in the end.

For the past few years, I always lose every time I gamble. Must be no gambling luck la. My brother always wins. But compared to my other cousins who can lose up to $10 in one day, I usually lose 2 to 3 bucks only.

My luck wasn't too bad today. But it's not the monety that matters. I just play for fun. So when I lose, I just take it as the price I paid for some entertainment.

I already got 6 red packets, total of $70 tonight.

And I'll probably stay over night at my auntie's house tomorrow with my cousins and play blackjack and mahjong throughout the night!

Hope I'll get lucky this year!

Yes, I know my entries are quite boring of late. Not that they were very interesting before though. I didn't really have time to blog properly. I don't even have enough sleep these few days (because I watch too much tv!).

So my recent entries are more of like accounts of what happened during the day. I apologise for the boring entries.

Entries over the Chinese new year will probably be like that too (if there are any entries).

My life's becoming a little monotonous. I have to make something interesting happen! Haha...

By the way, I just had a long chat with May Yee (from Conrad) on msn just now. Caught up with what's happening and stuff and passed her some photos. She says maybe I can meet up with her and the others for dinner next week or the week after next. She'll arrange for it. Yay! I'm so looking forward to it!

Some of my classmates didn't come to school today since we only came for celebrations. No lessons at all. Whee...

The celebrations started with lion dance by our very own VJ lion dance troupe. It was quite nice la.

Then we had performances by the Indian cultural society, dance, CO etc. Can't remember all. The dance by ICS was great! The dancers were "smooth" man! And the performance by dance was a little sexy actually. They all wore tight cheong sums and did slow movements... Hmm, interesting... Haha...

There was also an inter-house competition. It was really interesting and Pegasus did quite well. I really hope we get to be the champion house this year! I think we stand a good chance after getting good results in the past inter-house activities. Girls soccer: 1st. Guys soccer: 2nd. Cyclethon (distance): 2nd. Cyclethon (funds raised): 4th.

Then, I went back to Anglican High. There were quite a few people from 4J who went back. I saw Mdm Sim, Mr Tham, Mrs Lam, Mrs Lim and Mrs Tan. Didn't see Ms Ng and Wang lao shi though.

There were rather few conversation topics between us and the teachers so sometimes you could feel a little emptiness in between. Like we didn't have anything to say.

Anyway, I had fun! Then we went to Parkway for lunch at Yoshinoya. It was really a lot of fun eating and catching up with them. Miss them so so much! I felt so good after meeting them!

Gave my diaphragm muscles a good work out too since Joanne and I are laughing partners. Both of us are very easily tickled. And plus Hanjie and Joanne's lameness, I can laugh until I cry when I'm with them.

And we all decided to go back to AH on 11th Feb for the alumni gathering. Looking forward to it! Woohoo!

Sometimes when I tell my friends my views about some stuff, for example, I say so-and-so tv show totally sucks.

Then they say they love it, I tend to get affected by their point of view.

Instead of going on on how the show sucks, I tend to sway my opinion to what they think. I tend to not criticise the show so strongly then.

And I being a hypocrite? Like I suppress what I was planning to say and some how make it slant to the other person's point of view.

Maybe I'm just trying to avoid conflict. Like if u say Jay Chou sucks and insist on it after I tell you I like him, I'll probably be angry at you too.

Hmmm... I don't know.

I went for the TJ CNY carnival today.

It was great! Haven't seen the girls for a long time already. Xuan Yun, Si Hui, Hanjie, Joanne and Xiu Zhen were there. We saw Cindy too. Melissa brought her "friend" along but they walked on their own. She was almost blushing all the time. First time see her so shy. Whahaha...

I had a oreo and milk ice blended. Not really icy, but nice la. Also had cotton candy and saw Chen Yan there. She some more requested for a bigger cotton candy for me. Haha...

We also went over to see Si Hui's class's CT get dunked. She was sitting on a seat that would drop her into a large pool of water if the ball the students were throwing hit the lever. It costs $3 for one try I think. So expensive. But her classmates collected quite a sum among themselves and wouldn't give up until the teacher was wet. Haha... After like don't know how many tries, she finally got dunked.

After that we all played a dart game. We had to throw 3 darts at balloons and the prize you get would depend on your score. I never played darts before, but I was hoping to get lucky on my first try. In the end, my score was 0/3! Ahh... It was so weird la. Then I kept laughing because it was a little awkward and just quite funny.

Then the guy at the stall said since not many people got my score, he'll give me the balloon animal there. They were closing their stall soon anyway. Their prizes weren't that fantastic actually. So the balloon animal was actually quite a nice consolation. I brought it home in the end for fun.

Also saw Lu Jia there. Hi Lu Jia!!!

Then when almost all the stalls were closing, I bought curry with bread and a drink. It was quite nice. After that, we took bus together.

I had so much fun! Hope we can meet up another day soon to see the CNY fireworks!

Training wasn't that bad. The coach is nice! And she's female.

I had a mental image that HE would be fierce and bark at us to do our never-ending sets.

Maybe it's only the first training so it's not so tiring... yet.

But the best thing today was the toilet! The Chinese swimming club looks quite old from the outside. Who knows it would have such a cool toilet!

The bathing cubicles were huge! The door was frosted glass. The walls were some tiles and super clean. And the shower head was directly overhead so the water came down very nicely. No need to keep pressing that button for the water to come out too! And also have shampoo and soap dispensers, although I can't tell which is which. And... there's hot water!

Yes!!! I love the toilet!

Toilets are really important to me you know. If I had to go to a superb restaurant with a terrible toilet, I'll be totally put off by it. Overall, I judge a place by it's toilet. I know it's stupid. But the other factors are important too! I wouldn't go to an expensive place with lousy service or food just because the toilet there is nice!

And the girls bathed faster than the guys. The guys were quite shocked that we came out before them too. I guess they were too busy exploring the new toilet that they took such a long time. We agreed that we would bathe at least 20 minutes the next time. Don't waste such a good chance to bathe in a nice toilet. Maybe we can sing in the shower too, and hold karaoke session there! Haha...

Training wasn't as scary as I imagined. I was just over reacting. From now onwards, I'll look forward to going to the Chinese swimming club for training. Because then I can use the nice toilet!!!

I just feel so stressed. I’m free now till 2.30pm, then I have to go for training. Some how, I developed a phobia for swimming because I’m afraid that the training will be harsh. I told Sheryl and she said not to worry because usually the first training will be lighter. Makes sense… but I’m still worried. I can’t explain why.

And the teachers’ day flower sale is adding to the stress too. Me, Melissa and Jia Yan are in charge but the thing is, I’m the type that prefers to do everything myself. I don’t really trust other people with such stuff, especially if I know that it’s important. I do that to everyone, so it’s got nothing to do with the both of them.

They seemed so much more relaxed then me. Feels like I’m bringing it all on myself by taking on so many responsibilities. I know I should learn to delegate work. Maybe then things will turn out better.

Because of all these stuff, I haven’t been able to sleep enough and do my homework. That’s bad! I know I need to do my homework or else I’ll have a hard time catching up. And today, I think I looked sad because a lot of people asked me if I was fine. Do I look not-fine to you? I think I really do.

If this continues, I’ll soon become a walking zombie. Going around school daily expressionless and not having fun at all.

Ahhh… I don’t want things to be like that. Save me!

After the training from hell yesterday, I'm beginning to be afraid of trainings.

Some more we're going to Chinese Swimming Club tomorrow where a coach will teach us. I've never gone there before so I don't know what's it like. All I know is that it's going to be tougher than normal trainings. Even worse than the training on monday. We've been warned...

So, I'm afraid. I'm scared of going there (I also don't know why) although I'm almost the fastest girl among the lot. Ya, since I'm the only one who has trained for 1 year. I think the other IP girl who is the swimming pro is faster than me, I'm not sure of her standard though. What matters is that I'm not last... at least not yet.

Training on monday was so tough that it takes the fun out of swimming. Now I feel like wednesdays will be torture instead of having fun.

I'm afraid. So I'll be bringing mousy (mouse-see) with me to school. It's just a orange stuffed mouse and I "cute-tified" it's name. Haha... I'll just put it in my bag for comfort. Like I know that someone close is there with me. I know it sounds childish la. Laugh all you want. But I love my mousy. :)

Didn't have time to blog the past few days. So here's a short (maybe quite long) update on the stuff I've been up to.

Friday: Our second horti tea party. This time, a few more people came because they couldn't make it the last week. Altogether, we have 5 new members. And I guy came! Woo hoo! Happy... lalala... He says his friend (another GUY!) coming next week. I'm not crazy about younger guys or anything, in case you're wondering. It's just that I don't want horti to become a girls-only cca. Haha...

There were loads of snails! And the garden was in terrible shape cos we havn't done gardening since the December holidays. Even the hose was spoilt! Ahh... But we had fun. It was nice having more members. We each didn't have so much work to do with more hands to help out. And for the first time in a long time, I felt happy and relaxed during horti.

Saturday: The second SMU lesson. I finally spoke up in class. Teacher was asking a question in class and I thought I knew the answer so I said something. Turns out, I didn't exactly answer the question. What I said wasn't wrong, it was just not what he wanted. And I really felt nervous when everyone looked at me! Ahh... How am I going to earn my participation points like that?

Spent the rest of the day sleeping at home. Was so tired after a whole week of school that Saturday is the first chance I actually get to sleep as much as I want. My Dad came back from his Taiwan business trip today.

Monday: Swimming after school. I made and repeated some stupid mistake that Mrs Leong kinda scolded me out loud. I swam in the wrong lane (again) then she shouted "Charlynn!" to tell me that I was in the wrong lane. But her tone was hmm... just not-nice. So I was a little offended and while I was swimming that lap, I was like cursing at the top of my voice, just that I couldn't speak while swimming. Maybe that made me swim a little faster? Haha... But I was still recovering from flu so I was a little breathless.

And from now onwards, a teacher will come along for all our trainings. Means we don't have time to slack anymore. Mrs Leong made Ding Yong make us do more for each set. I swam 2.8km in total and I was totally worn out. Because I was a little sick and also because we didn't use to do so much of each set (like kicking, pulling etc.). Usually we only did 3 x 100m pulling but yesterday, she made us do 5 x 200m! Want us to die ar?!

And I feel that Ding Yong (swimming captain) and I are getting friendlier. In the past, we didn't talk much. Sometimes walk past one another in school also never say hi (or pretend never see). What to do, I got attitude problem mah. Maybe it's just because we just don't have much chances to talk. I don't hate him. And I'm the type that wait for people to talk to me first then I talk to them that type so since he never talk to me first, I also seldom got the chance to talk to him.

I think he's taking the first move to become friendly to me. Maybe it's because of the new year 1s. Cos he's the "leader" of the guys, being the captain and all. And I'm the girls' "leader" since I'm the most experienced girl there. So it'll be better that 2 of us are friends then it won't become such that swimming is distinctively split into the girls and guys group. Or maybe I'm just reading too much into it. Oh well...

Anyway, on the way back, we took MRT, together with SIwei (new member). I know he stays very near me and he knows that too. But we never take the same train together before, except once when Fabian was with us. Fabian did most of the talking that day while Ding Yong and I weren't really talking to one another. Didn't know what to say la. But yesterday, we talked more than we ever did. I think we talked more than all our past conversations added together.

Still felt a little awkward. It's not the type of conversation that you have with your really good friends, the type where you say anything you want and laugh so loudly that people in the train can hear. It was more of plain talking. Maybe it's because my close friends are mostly girls so I don't really know what stuff guys like to talk about. Haha...

Yup, so after I reached home, I was totally exhausted. Physically exhausted. It suddenly felt so good to just sit on the sofa and do nothing else. I was so tired to move my body that I decided I wouldn't do any homework. After eating dinner and bathing, I watched tv as I waited for my hair to dry. I watched the Victoria Secrets fashion show. Great "clothes" and of course, great models!

Then I went to sleep. I slept really really early (compared to the previous days). 11.30pm!

Tuesday (today): I went to XX florist today. The florist that we're buying our Valentines' day flowers from. I got a shock when I found out that it was actually a shop in some market. I thought it was quite a big company with office and stuff. In the end, it's just a small shop. (can't tell you the actual name and place)

No particular reason why. Maybe it's just because I have no reason to be happy.

I'm terribly tired and Thursday is my longest day. Lessons from 8am to 5pm with only 2 periods (35 minutes each) of break in between. And one break is right after pe, for me to shower, and that leaves me only one break to rest. And I still have 2 S papers lecture one after one another. Tired man...

And Mr Goh was in a bad mood today. He scolded some guys for not turning up for 3rd period pe. I guess he's the type that's very strict with discipline. In the end, we only played a little of badminton and tennis. A lot of time was wasted on scolding them.

Maths S was really chaotic. I didn't know that the lecturer was saying because I didn't complete my tutorial. It was too difficult.

I like Econs S though. The teacher is really interesting and I just have this interest for econs. Unlike other lectures where I either dislike the lesson or don't-like-or-don't-hate it, I look forward to Econs S. Maybe next time I'll look forward to having it at the end of the day then I won't feel so tired.

I was having a flu the entire day. Kept blowing my nose. And I felt really tired too. I used up all my tissue that I had to buy another pack. And what a coincidence, Li Yue was blowing away too.

The only happy thing is that I received another letter from my angel. He seems like a funny guy. And he gave me a pack of sweets too. Yay!

And Amarjote found out that her angel and mortal are the same person! The handwriting was the same. Even some of the contents of the 2 letters were the same. The present (some sweets and chocolates) were almost similar. It's weird to receive almost the same thing twice! Wonder if her angel/mortal found out yet. Haha..

Tomorrow will be a better day!

Something nice happened just before I got home. And I was so excited to blog about it so I could always remember this feeling.

But somehow, there was a problem with my internet connection and I had to restart and shut down my computer a few times. Finally it worked.

But the feeling already "flew" away by then. Damn.

Will blog about it when it happens again.

Yes, as expected, my legs are aching. They ache more than they ever had. Because of the run yesterday.

I couldn't walk properly the whole day today and I think I was walking weird. Don't know if people realised or not, because I was trying very hard to walk normal and bear with the pain. Especialy when I walk down the stairs.

Somehow, I like the pain sometimes cos it gives me a sense of satisfaction that I've pushed my limits. But in small quantities please! It is the first time my legs ache so much because of exercise!

Today is also diabetes awareness day in VJ. Bernice went up to talk about how she copes with her condition and it was really brave of her! Last time when I went on stage to make announcement, I was so scared. But Bernice looked quite calm, and a little shy too. Haha, but brave girl nonetheless!

There was also a inter-house cycling competition. Each house had a stationary bike and we are supposed to see which house can cycle the most. I cycled for about 5 minutes, 3km and my highest speed was 47km/hour. I was the fastest girl in my class and I really didn't expect it. Amelia was really close behind.

The weird thing is, my legs didn't ache at all during the cycling. Maybe I was too distracted to think about it. I'm sure it'll get pain-er!

In the end, Pegasus got a total of 208km. Our result was quite good but some people thought we cheated precisely because our result was too good to be true. In the end, results weren't released today. I think it's because there was some doubt about everyone's total distance since most of us had some problems in between.

After the cyclethon, I went to run 2 rounds around the school with Joanne. Joanne is a really fit girl and exercises very often. My class's girls got 1st for cross country last year and we're determined to win it again! So every one must do their best and train hard! It's not a surprise that we won since we have quite a few sports people.

One round around the school is about 1.6km. So I ran another 3.2km today.

Die! I think I won't be able to walk tomorrow. And it doesn't hurt when I run. Maybe I should replace normal walking with running then it won't hurt as much. Haha...

When I came home just now, I was almost limping. Hope it'll get better tomorrow. I still have swimming training after school!

Angel and Mortal

My Angel from my junior class gave me a note today! So happy because girls have guy angels and vice versa so I was quite worried that my angel would be someone who wouldn't bother playing this game.

It's a simple note on foolscap paper with not-very-nice handwriting in blue ink.

He said he gave me chocolate but I think it wasn't fastened properly to the note so it got mixed up. In the end, my chocolate got given to Timothy by mistake. So sad! But I'm still happy that my angel bothered to give me something.

My mortal hasn't written back after I wrote to him 2 days ago. Hope he replies. If he doesn't, then I'll just continue writing to him, until I'm quite sure that he won't reply at all then I'll stop writing. How long can I keep up writing to someone who doesn't reply?

Anyway, I'm just glad that I have a nice angel. I'm a nice mortal so I'll write back. If only I had a nice mortal too.

Horticulture

Horti is planning to have a delivery venture with TJC. So TJcians can order flowers for their friends in VJ while Victorians can order flowers for their friends in TJC. Just now, Jean from TJ, who's in charge of the entrepreneur club we're working with suggested expanding the project to NYJC and TPJC as well.

I really support this idea. It's great! I'm all for it.

If we do it well, it'll be a great success. It involves 4 JC and a whole lot of people and flowers. And if people like the idea, our juniors can continue doing this years down the road and I'm so proud of it because it's my idea!

It'll become some sort of tradition on Valentine's day. Like how it's tradition to celebrate teachers' day and chinese new year in schools.

And I was the one who came up with it.

Of course, we have to be really careful. If the orders get mixed up, it could be a great disaster.

I told my teacher about this. She's not supportive of it though. When I first propsed the idea of working with TJ, she was quite pessimistic about it. Somehow, she keeps thinking that this venture won't be a large scale success. She thinks it won't be very welcomed by the students. She's kinda conventional in that way. Very safe and doesn't want to take risks. In the end, she allowed it anyway.

Now that we're planning to expand the project, I'm not suprised that she's not in favour of it. I reasoned with her that I was certain the response would be good. Then she relented by saying maybe we can work with tpjc and tj. Ok, at least I got half of what I wanted. She still left it up to me though. If I went ahead and did all 4 schools, she wouldn't be able to stop me. But still, it would be better to have her approval.

If we don't get to do this now, I will never get a chance to do it again after I leave VJ next year. Then I'll regret not doing something that I have confidence, would be great. At least if I fail this time, I'll be satisfied knowing that I tried my best and not have any regrets.

I asked Jia Yan and Melissa about what they thought. Both of them are in favour of it. But Jia Yan thinks we should do tj and tpjc only. I agree too, cos after some thought, 4 jcs may get too messy. 3 is just nice. So I decided that I'll tell Mrs Chuah my decision tomorrow and hopefully she'll give us her support!

Running

I was never good at running. So when I realised that we had to run for gym training today, I wan't particularly looking forward to it.

But somehow, I was in the mood for running and it seemed fun. We ran 3.2km in total (for the girls). Guys ran 5.2km. If the juniors weren't here and I had to run with the guys as the only girl, I think I would have have been able to run the same distance. But slower, or course.

Cheryl and Ngang Ju were slower than me. It's expected cos they haven't started training yet. I was kinda happy though, cos it made me feel like I was the best. Haha. But of course it's because I've been training one year more than them.

After the run, I felt my legs ache a little. I know it's going to be more painful tomorrow...

It's not me. It's my Mum.

She was telling my Dad about how she didn't have anything to look forward to.

I understand how she feels because when my brother and I were younger, she was so occupied with taking care of us that she hardly had time for herself. But now that we've grown a little bigger, she has less responsibilities (although she still nags at us).

And somehow, she feels that she doesn't have anything to look forward to. Days seem to pass and she does the same things day after day, week after week. Her work is becoming monotonous. Things only become more exciting when there are different things to do, for example during Christmas and New Year celebrations.

I totally understand how she feels because sometimes I feel that way when my school work becomes tiring. I feel like I go to school day after day, attending lectures and tutorials, come home, watch television while I eat my dinner, do my homework then go to sleep at midnight, or later.

Then next morning, I wake up at 6am, totally tired and deprived or sleep and go to school again. Monday is not that tiring since it's after the weekends. But by the time it gets to Friday, I'm totally drained.

On Saturdays, I have to wake up early for training, now it's lessons at SMU, and then I go out with my family. I look forward to Saturdays because it's family day. I always go out with them and whether it's shopping, or just walking around, I really enjoy it.

I usually sleep late on Saturdays because I know I can wake up late next morning. So on Sunday, I usually wake up at 12 noon, recovering the sleep I've been deprived of during the week. Then I stay at home the whole day to do my homework that's due the next week. I don't usually finish the work I've set out to do though.

Then the cycle continues.

Ok, back to the point. This is about my Mum.

I guess life's more boring for her since she's a housewife and doesn't go out much, except on our family day. And she doesn't have any tests or exams to make her life more interesting (not that I look forward to them).

She says she wants to take up social dance at the community centre but my Dad doesn't want to go with her. I don't mind going with her though, it's fun and I don't mind being the guy. The thing is, will the teacher allow? And will I have time for it since it's in the evening. I end swimming quite late and need to do my homework.

My Mum really sacrified a lot for my brother and I. She gave up her job to be a full time housewife so she could take good care of us. I didn't understand that in the past when she used to nag that we should appreciate everything she did for us. Now I do.

I promise I'll take good care of her in future (my Dad too, of course!).

Today, I want to write this down so that should I forget in the future, I can read this and make sure I fufil my promise.

It's for the advanced placement course for International Economics.

And guess what? The teacher was late for more than half an hour! It was due to some miscommunication so he got the time wrong.

And while we were waiting outside the seminar room for the teacher to arrive, I was looking at the clothes others were wearing. Some of them dressed really matured. Some were ok ok... But they mostly looked nice. And when I walked around SMU, I realised that the clothes the students wear look quite expensive.

I wonder if I can dress nicely when I go to university since I don't really buy expensive clothes. My clothes look ok, they don't look expensive. It's just average. I really think that it's easier wearing uniform, although it's not as nice as home clothes. Because you don't have to worry about what to wear every morning and don't need to care how people will look at the way you dress.

I was glad that my clothes were quite presentable today. I think everyone dressed nicer than they usually do today to give others a good impression of them. Maybe their clothes will become more average as the weeks pass.

Luckily Sheryl (not the one from my class) and Qian Qi were there too. If not I wouldn't have known anyone else there. We knew each other from Bizclub. There were another 4 VJ guys but we didn't know them. We got to know some of them later when we were put into groups. Andy and Vi were in our group.

When the teacher came, we started lesson. The first part was about introduction to the format and syllabus of the course. The SMU system is such that 30% of the exam marks come from class participation. Meaning the teacher grades you on how much you ask questions in class and how much you participate in class discussion.

It's a disadvantage to those who are naturally quiet in class though (like me). Although I have to agree that this idea may help us to learn more if we ask questions and discuss stuff in class.

At first, people were quite quiet. After a while, they started speaking up. It was then that I felt I was kinda in the wrong class. How come they all know stuff I don't? Then I realised that oh, maybe it's because they read the newspaper and I don't. I see... Haha...

Some were quite open to discussion when other people voiced out their disagreements to their arguments. But there was this particular girl and her friend who were kinda arrogant. The tone of their voices seemed to say "Hey you! Listen to me. Cos I'm right and you're wrong".

They spoke really strongly and although they showed that they read the newspapers and had their facts right, it just puts me off. I don't like the way they talk.

The rest of the lesson was fine. We learnt about comparative advantage and strangly enough, we learnt about the same topic during econs lecture on Thursday so the lesson was rather easy to understand.

I felt that the way my econs lecturer taught us was made the topic much easier to understand than the way the SMU lecturer did it. It's strange when they took the same amount of time and I thought the SMU lecturer was supposed to be better.

The lesson ended at about 12.30pm when it was supposed to end at 12. From now onwards, Saturday is no longer my rest day (not that it ever was. I used to have training on sat morn.) but training was much more relaxing on the mind than this lecture.

I don't like the system of grading on participation. What if I understand the lesson and I don't need to ask questions? What if I don't have any opposing views on what the teacher says? How to voice my views like that? Or maybe I should say out loud "Yes, I agree" periodically to show my "participation". -_-"

Whatever it is, I'm determined to pass the exam at the end of the module (which includes doing well for the participation component). If not, I would have wasted 13 Saturday mornings. I could have been swimming or better still, sleep in if I was "sick". Haha...

Welcome year 1s! Or should I say year 1.

20 people signed up, but only 1 year 1 turned up for the welcome party today. But wait till you hear the rest. It's not as bad as it sounds.

Her name is Ping. She's from Indonesia. We call her Ping for short.

Kim also came. She's a year 2, but she's joining anyway.

We were really worried when only Ping came so we started calling the other people who signed up. Some of themdidn't pick up. But there were about 4 who were interested in joining, but couldn't make it today.

We prepared quite a lot of food for the tea party. Frankly, I was expecting about 7 year 1s to turn up.

Anyway, even with so few people, we had fun! We took turns telling everyone about what we love about horti and I briefed them about the stuff we're going to do this year. At the same time, we passed the chips around.

It was really fun because we just talked and ate. I love that! In yesterday's post, I said I felt my relationships with the horti people were kinda strained because of all the responsibilities and stuff. But when we're not doing serious stuff, we still have a lot of fun.

After a while, we walked around the school while Ryan introduced us to the plants in the garden and in our new landscaped area at the VJ entrance. The new area was quite nice. People hardly ever go there. It was my first time too, and it's beautiful. That is, if you turn a blind eye to the HUGE red ants that are crawling almost everywhere.

Ping is a nice girl. She's really quiet though. So sometimes when I see her alone, I'll try to talk to her so she won't feel too lonely.

Kim is fitting in well. She's super friendly and fits in so well that it feels as if we all knew her for a long time already. That's something I really love about her. You can feel so comfortable around her. It's something I think I'll never be able to do.

But the thing is, Kim is fitting in so well that I feel a little jealous. It's like I'm saying "Hey, Kim's my friend, don't snatch her away from me!". I know I shouldn't be feeling this way, but I just can't help it. I'm the very jealous type.

Luckily, I'm still rational enough to do the right thing. I'm happy that she's fitting in well, although I still feel a little sore deep inside. She's a great friend and I shouldn't stop her from making more friends just because I like her so much.

But there were a few times when Kim came over to talk to me. As if she knew what I was thinking inside. I don't think she really knows that I'm jealous. Maybe she still feels closer to me compared to all the others.

Anyway, I just hope that Kim will be happy here. No point having her all to myself if she's not her happy and cheerful self. :)

*** Mr Goh ***

That's the name of our new pe teacher for this year. Coincidentally, he's also one of the teachers in charge of swimming. I just found out yesterday (one year after I joined!) when he came for our training session for the first time. He doesn't recognise me though.

Some things he said today and yesterday made a lot of sense. Let me share it with you and hopefully, it'll inspire you too, like it inspired me...

Yesterday, he told all of us that our training was not intensive enough. Because Ding Yong (our captain) could not be too strict with us since we're all friends. If he was too strict, we'll have greater chances of getting into the finals but we'll probably end up hating him too. That's the reason for our training being not intensive enough. And that's why we can't train to the best of our potential.

It would be different with an external coach though. He probably wouldn't care if we hated him or not. That's why he can give us military style training that would be really beneficial to us.

Mr Goh said that when he's with his friends, when it comes to serious work, he can draw the line and be totally serious. But after work, they all become friends and forget the conflicts they have because of their leadership authority in that group.

I think it's something that I can really learn. Right now, sometimes I feel like I can't be too strict or commanding in horti if not I'll afftect the friendships I have. But sometimes, I feel like there's a need to be fierce if work doesn't get done. Being nice all the time gets very little work done.

Somehow, I think that if you're a leader of a group, it's not easy to be a good leader and a good friend at the same time. You have conflicts due to work and it may affect your friendships.

An example would be Ah Ming from Conrad. He's the assistant chef in charge and he can be really fierce when things aren't perfect. After all, in a top hotel, everything has to be flawless. When things are alright though, he can be really fun to be with. But the thing is, I know some people dislike his style of being too fierce. They don't see why he has to be such a perfectionist.

Do you really have to sacrifice some of your friends if you are a leader of that group? That's a question I've been trying to find an answer to.

I've also seen leaders who are great friends as well.

For example, Lu Jia (I know you're reading this. Hahaz...) was the choir president but she was a friend to everyone. Joanne (monitress of 4J) was a wonderful friend and leader as well. I just have to observe how others do it, then hopefully I can get it one day.

I can already feel my friendships in horti being strained because I get angry when people don't do their work.

Also, Melissa and I were in the same class from sec 1 to 4 but ever since she joined horti and became the vice-chair, I feel like we talk about horti almost all of the time. Our relationship is so different from what I have with my other good friends. I'm trying to overcome this though. I want her to be my good friend, not just my partner in horti.

Something else Mr Goh said today also struck me.

Being our new pe teacher, he set the rules and told us what he expects of us on our first lesson today. He told us that we exercise for ourselves, not for him. It's something that most pe teachers miss out on. They always give me the impression that they want us to do well for NAPFA then they won't bother about our fitness level after that. But Mr Goh was different.

He said:

"When I ask you to run 4 rounds, run 5 rounds and you 'gain' one round. Don't run 3 rounds, then think that you 'gained' one round by running less."

These words just made a lot of sense to me. You may not think anything of it, because this is just one of the moments that I hear something that sunddenly strikes me. I never thought of it this way and it'll probably have a great impact on my life. I've had a few of these moments every now and then and these really impact my life even though it's only something small.

He also said that NAPFA can be enjoyable. If you're fit and in good shape, then it would be a chance for you to show off your physical fitness. After hearing that, I decided that I want to train hard. I want to be able to show off for NAPFA!

Mr Goh seems like a really good person. Good meaning a good role model and someone you can look up to.

*** S Papers ***

It's the first day of S (Special) papers and I'm taking Maths and econs. Maths was totally chaotic. I did the wrong questions because I referred to the wrong page. So when Mr Ho was going through the solutions, I was just copying blindly most of the time. It seems so difficult that I don't have confidence in doing well for the final paper.

Mr Ho made it seem so difficult to score a distinction. He said it'll get better later on as we learn more, but I'm not so sure.

Mr Ho is a wonderful teacher by the way. His frankness and weird sense of humour is interesting. He's really straightforward and can be a no-nonsense person sometimes. But when he gets lame, the entire LT can "freeze" in a second. Brr... cold!

For econs S paper, our lecturer (I don't know his name) was really interesting. He's an ang moh and the words he uses are just so amusing. If he and another normal person were to say the same thing, I would probably laugh at the way he says it and not at the other person. It's just amazing the way he phrases his words and how he expresses himself.

He made the entire lecture seem like a story telling session and it was really interesting to listen to him. Maybe it's also because I'm interested in econs, that's why I find it interesting. But towards the end of the lecture, when our attention was fading, it got kinda boring because my brain couldn't really register what he was saying. I was just hearing words but I couldn't comprehend their meaning.

So far, S papers seem interesting, although it's a little intimidating. The lectures today give me the feeling that if I prepare my work before each lesson, it can be really interesting. The S paper is an interlectual challenge. It would be interesting only if I knew the answers.

I'm so so happy today!

We have new additions to the swimming family! Woo hoo!

I'm especially excited about the new girls. We have 6 of them! Yay!

1 year 2, 1 IP1 and 4 more year 1 girls.

No more being the only girl in swimming (after Li Ling quit recently). And I finally have company in the changing room again!

The new girls are really nice! No bitchy, arrogant people. Just really sweet and friendly girls. I love them already!

It was a rainy day but we swam anyway. The water was super cold that it literally took your breath away. But it also felt very nice because it was really cool after you got used to it.

I kinda became the girls' "leader" since I was the only experienced girl. It kinda feels weird, but it was nice too!

At first I was a little worried that the juniors might be better than me then I'll get jealous and all.

Right now, they're alright. About my standard when I first started. But I'm not worried about them being better than me now that I've got to know them. Because they're really nice people.

The IP girl was from China and she took part in many competitions before. I think she's already faster than me right now. Not sure though, since the year 1s and 2s were separated for time trials today.

I really hope they can improve quick then we can take part in relay. Of course, they'll also push me to train harder because I really don't wanna lose to them due to a lack of training on my part.

I love these girls! Girl power! Yeah!

It's the last day of orientation. Like tradition, the year 1s will go to East Coast to play games and stuff. I wasn't planning to join them today since we had lessons but our principal knew that a lot of us were planning to crash the orientation anyway, so she made it "legal" for us to join them from 10.30am onwards.

In other words, no more lessons after 10.30am. Yay!

I ended lessons at 9.15am then me, Li Yue, Sheryl, Jasmine and Amelia went to East Coast to roller blade. There were quite a few year 2s cycling as well. I think we were the only group blading.

Amelia was a really good roller blader. Joanne and Li Yue also. Jasmine was quite good, but Sheryl didn't really know how to blade. My standard was somewhere in between Jasmine and Sheryl.

We had lots of fun! I love roller blading, just that I can't do it "with style". Haha. Amelia looked so cool wearing those roller blades!

I looked like I was going to fall down any time. Usually I'll wear the knee and wrist guards but I didn't wear the knee guards today. Seriously, I think it makes your legs look shorter and more clumsy. Hahaha...

I wore the wrist guards though. Was scared of falling down after all.

I could only move forward, but I had a serious problem stopping. I can't brake at all!

Halfway, Li Yue fell down while she was learning how to brake by turning. It was quite a serious fall because she fell backwards and used her hands to break her fall. But her left hand felt very painful after she hit the ground. We were all so worried that she might have broken her arm!

But luckily, nothing happened. Li Yue and I went to have a drink at the coffee shop and take a rest at the same time. The others roller bladed back to school. I really wonder how they managed to get across the overhead bridge on roller blades. They said they walked up sideways. Must have been really tiring!

But the thing is, after we rested at the coffeeshop and started blading again, it soon started raining! It started with a small drizzle but got heavier quite quickly.

We went to a shelter while the others were still in school so they had to wait for the rain to get smaller before they came back. Our money and receipt was all with Jasmine so we couldn't return the blades.

In the end, the rain didn't really get smaller so Amelia borrowed a bicycle from a teacher and cycled all the way back (in the heavy rain) to return the blades.

After returning, she cycled back to school while I walked barefooted back. My feet were wet so I didn't want to dirty my shoes. Li Yue went back to the hostel.

I never knew the floor was so rough! My feet hurt after walking all the way back like that. And of course, I was quite drenched.

It's sad that orientation had to end because of the rain. We would have had such a good time if there weren't any rain.

We wanted to wash up at the toliet but there were too many people queuing up to shower so we wanted to go to another toilet and just use the sink to wash up.

But when we went to the toilet, the auntie was complaining because there were people washing up there previously and they made the entire toliet really sandy and dirty. So of course we couldn't wash up in front of her.

In the end, we filled our bottles with water from the water cooler and washed our feet outside the toilet. We just poured the water on the floor since everywhere was already wet because of the rain.

We managed to wash our feet and wear our shoes to go home. Luckily Jasmine brought umbrella so I could share with her. Everytime when I bring my umbrella, I never get to use it. But whenever i don't bring, it always rains! Haiz...

This orientation really makes me miss our orientation last year! I miss being a year 1!

I moved to www.icecold-coffee.blogspot.com on 4th January 2006 but I only have time to talk about the reason behind moving now.

I was originally at icecoldcoffee.blogspot.com. It's stupid to change it by just adding a dash in between, but I couldn't thing of any better name. Besides, I like this name so I was really wondering if it would be a right move to go someplace else.

The main reason I moved was because I didn't want my present classmates to find out. After Si Hui and Melissa got their blogs, they linked me and recently, I realised that Si Hui linked Charlene too. Charlene is in my class, that's why I wouldn't want her to find out.

If I have to keep worrying "what if so and so finds my blog?" I can never blog in peace. I have to think through everything I write to make sure that even if it's found out, I won't offend anybody. But then, that would be stupid because I can't write what I want to!

Secondly, it's also because Melissa is in horti and sometimes if I want to complain about horti stuff, I have to worry about how she would react if she read it. Before I moved, I felt like everything I wanted to say, I couldn't say freely. Either I had to not mention it at all, or I had to change the way I felt about it.

Then seriously, it would be silly to blog about stuff I didn't think was true.

I want my blog to keep memories of my life so that I can read my posts and remember stuff. My blog is for me to talk about anything I want, my thoughts, my life and for me to complain about stuff.

I should be allowed to write what I want!

We met our junior class today. They had their CT session straight after assembly and my class didn't have lessons so we followed them to their classroom. But the thing is, we were waiting outside while their teacher were talking to them. And we were the only class doing that. Made us seem so desperate to meet them. Haha. I guess we were just too excited.

Their class had a good mix of guys and girls, just like ours. 13 guys and 12 girls, I think.

We went in after their teacher left to introduce ourselves. And of course, we had to introduce them to a very, very important VJ tradition... JTS!!!

It stands for junior treat senior. We treated our seniors to Pizza Hut last year. Wonder where we should go this time. We're very nice seniors so we won't ask for too expensive places. Haha.

Actually our civics tutor objects to this tradition. She told us last year (after we treated our seniors) that she wants to stop this tradition since the juniors have to pay for themselves and us when we go out.

But the thing is, it's a chance for the 2 classes to go out and get to know one another better. Last year after we treated out seniors, we got closer and it's good to know more seniors in the school. If there was no JTS, we'll probably not know each other's names by the end of the year.

Besides, our juniors will become seniors too. Wait till they ask their juniors to treat them back.

We'll also be playing angel and mortal until Valentine's day and the pairing of angel and mortal is such that it'll be a girl and a guy. Usually in this case, the girls lose out since guys don't really do much.

Luckily for me last year, my angel was really nice. Hope this time my angel won't be too bad either. I'll definitely be nice to my mortal, provided he replies to my messages of course. If not it''s really no point to keep writing to someone and being nice without any reply.

I haven't really got used to the fact that I'm a senior. I miss not seeing MY seniors in school. I miss that fact that some of the people I usually see around are no longer here. Somehow, having seniors in the school makes me feel more comfortable.

I feel that when we became year 2s, we became more mature. I feel different in school now. Like we have more responsibilities. Instead of being taken care of, we have to take care of our juniors.

It's a different feeling, and I'm still not sure if I like it.

On another note, Jasmine, Li Yue and me went to Parkway for lunch after school. It's the first time we're going out when it's not a class outing. So far, I've only went out with my JC classmates when we arrange a class outing. It's like we tend to be more attached to our secondary school friends that we don't arrange to go out with one another on our own.

I really, really hope we can go out like that more often so that when we leave JC we can still keep in touch!

Today is the second day of orientation and we're having our cca walkabout.

I thought we had to set up our booths by 11.15am. But apparently, I heard wrongly, because it only started at 12.

There were only 3 of us who were suppposed to be manning the booth. Me, Melissa and Ryan.

I told them to meet at 10.30. Ryan couldn't make it because he was taking R paper. Melissa knew there were only 2 of us setting up the booth because I called her last night. But at 10.30, she messaged me that she'll be going for some bio lesson.

At that time, I was seriously shocked. How can I set up the booth on my own?

Jasmine also got angry because one of her members told her that she'll be late only at the last minute.

Both of us decided that we'll help one another set up our booths. After all, our booths were at the concourse and if we don't get the tables there, we'll have to move the ones from the canteen!

So luckily, we manged to get the tables.

Li Yue came to help me since she was free. I really appreciated it since I was feeling kinda lost by myself then. Luckily, Melissa came, then everything was beginning to fall into place.

I was really angry with Melissa for being late, but after seeing that the cca walkabout was starting later than I expected, I figured there's no point getting angry. We're friends after all.

I went to get the watering can to put at the booth for decoration and while I was rinsing it, a small black lizard came out of the spout when I poured water out! It was so disgusting! Eeew...

For the walkabout, Kimberly also came. And she sat at our booth for most of the time. She wasn't one of our members. She just came for fun.

All in all, we got 23 people on the sign up list.

But actually only 20 people signed up. I wrote my name once and Melissa wrote hers twice. It was just to make our list seem a little longer. Haha.

There was one particular guy who was concerned that horti is a girls' cca. (Can't blame him since all of us at the booth were girls) He only agreed to put down his name after I told him we had 7 guy seniors.

He had a friend with him but his friend didn't want to sign up. After both of them left, his friend came back after a while to write his name. This shows that they're quite interested!

That's good, because I was really worried we would have too few guys. Most of the people who signed up were girls.

On the whole, the walkabout went better than I expected. Nothing went wrong and our booth was very nicely decorated. Happy... :)

The fever's gone and the flu is almost going too.

Thanks so much to my Mum for taking such good care of me the entire day yesterday and staying up to 1am to remind me to take my medicine.

But I don't want to go back to school tomorrow. Seems like my entire holidays are gone in the blink of an eye. I still haven't had enough time to rest and play.

I seriously want to have more holidays. But I know I won't be able to have that.

Oh well, I'll just have to make the best of it and enjoy going back to school.

I'm sick! I didn't have a good night's sleep and I was feeling cold the entire night although I was wearing a jacket and covering myself with 2 blankets.

I kept feeling cold then suddenly hot, then cold again the entire day. And I was so tired that I kept sleeping. But I couldn't sleep well so I woke up after a while then had to sleep again half an hour later.

My whole body felt hot because of the fever, but I was cold. It's just weird.

Not exactly how I expected to spend my new year.